Friday, August 5, 2011

To tell the truth...

So, I know I have not written about the second half of Josiah's birth story - hoping to get there this week - there is just a lot of stuff to think and pray about as I write it and I want to make sure I don't leave anything out. 
In the meantime, I have a story to tell.  About a sin.  About a sin I did.  YES, as a mom, it does happen from time to time, but after confessing it to my children, I feel the Holy Spirit urging me to share the story with all of you. 
Today was Josiah and Ava's last day of VBS at Village.  They had a great time and I have been blessed by their attitudes and I am so grateful for all the people that helped put it together for the kids. 
It is lunch time, the babies are hungry, naptime is quickly approaching, and Lena hasn't pooped yet and needs to, which means it is time to get home.  I picked up Ava from her class, and then we go get Josiah. 
As soon as we pick up Josiah, and we say our thanks and goodbyes to his teachers, he says, "Mom, can we go to the picnic?" 
"The picnic."  I repeat.
"Yes the picnic, it's $7.00." (I don't have $7 cash on me)
"Um, do you have information on it?"
Josiah: "Well, maybe in my papers."
"let's go out to the car and look at it."
I start loading up the babies in their carseats while Josiah looks through his papers. 
"I can't find it mom!"  Josiah starts to get panicked. 
"I think it's today Josiah, and I don't think we can go, we need to go home if it's right now." 
"maybe we can ask someone?" 
"Josiah, when did you first hear about the picnic?"
"yesterday..." 
"If you had told me about it yesterday, maybe we could have considered it.  But I just found out about it just now."  (LIE!  Why didn't I say today?  I don't know)  Because floating in my mind is an email my sister in law sent me earlier this morning about how there was a picnic after VBS. 
We drove home, and I had a very sad son who did not get to go to a picnic. 

Now, yes, I need more warning about a picnic, and Josiah needs to recognize that he needs to ask and not just expect that we can do something.  But see, how that conversation went?  I didn't have to make it get that built up and then have the disappointment be even worse.  I could have been upfront and told him I had heard about it, but we were not able to go because of the reasons I listed above.   These thoughts floated in my mind on the drive home. 
Then we got into the craziness of unloading babies, feeding lunch and Lena pooping and naptime.  I started to vacuum and mop my floors.  And the Lord gently brought it to my mind again.  Josiah and Ava would never know I hadn't been completely honest with them, but I knew that I needed to tell them the truth. 

So I sat them down, and told them how I had not been honest with them.  Telling them how I had found out about the picnic this morning, but instead of telling them immediately no, I took a wrong turn, because I didn't want to tell them no, even though I needed to, and so I lied about it. 

Josiah and Ava were both very forgiving and kind about it.  And my soul feels clean and light and I am so grateful for the opportunity to take my sin and confess it. 
Not only that, but Josiah brings down a little flyer he got from VBS, and shows me a page in it - it has pictures of 5 children that told lies about different things.  And at the bottom, it says, "Jesus forgives." 
I thanked him so much for sharing that with me, and as he heads back up the stairs to begin lego creating for the afternoon, he turns around with his sweet dimpled smile and says, "I hope that made you feel better mom." 
Yes Josiah, yes it made me very comforted to know that Jesus forgives, and that HE would turn my sin around and use it for His glory instead.  :)  

So BLESSED!

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