Wednesday, September 1, 2010

I had a dream... (hey what little girl doesn't)

I was a dreamer and had an imagination. I used to curl up in my closet of my childhood house, that I made into a little office area. A friend's mom gave me a typewriter, and I would imagine out all the stories I would write. I had dreams. Plans for my life.
Plans to be a writer. To be a singer. To be a hair stylist. To be a photographer. To be a chef. I was ambitious in all my dreams, but in reality I had no idea what I would do with all of these ideas. I had no direction.

But when I was almost 11, God gave me a dream that I tucked away in my heart, one that stayed with me more than any other past plans for my life. On June 28th, 1989, my sister Abigail Lynn was born into this world. My parents allowed my brother and I to be in the hospital room and watch her birth. Let me tell you this, I was freaked out when I saw them give my mom an episiotomy. But shortly after that, a beautiful baby girl came into this world, with a beautiful head full of dark brown hair. It was the most amazing thing I had ever witnessed in my life.
In the few years that followed, my mom home schooled me, which allowed me to participate in all the baby things, learning and observing all the different parts that were involved in parenting. And what I discovered was, that more than anything else in this life, I wanted to be a mom someday. I wanted to get married, and have a family, and stay home and take care of my beautiful children.

So began the hunt for the right husband to do the job of providing, loving me and loving children. Laugh if you want, but I was a girl on a mission. I went through all sorts of little crushes and loves over the next several years, as most girls the age of 12 - 15 do... I made mistakes, and got hurt and hurt others through choices that were of my own, and not seeking God in this area. Well, I did "seek" Him, but in the way of approaching him with my plans, and asking that they would be His plans too. Let's just say, I had a lot of growing up I needed to do.

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